Dear Friend of Life:
In all your years of sidewalk counseling at abortion centers, there are some faces and names you never forget. (Likely, because we are called to continue to pray for them.)
I’ll never forget “Junior.”
It was the summer of 2006 when I was sidewalk counseling almost full-time with the local Diocesan pro-life committee in Dallas. I frequently was scheduled to reach out during the week at Fairmount abortion center, a cottage-looking facility in Uptown Dallas. Access to clients going in and out of that facility was phenomenal; based on the set-up of the center and the location of the sidewalk, we could almost walk right up to the door. Because of the easy access to clients and God’s amazing grace, we frequently experienced little miracles while out there.
I remember a man and his wife entering the facility one hot summer morning; I remember noting his casual dress and the white ball cap he was wearing. They refused to talk with us on the way in. But the man soon left the facility and was going back and forth to his car to grab additional items.
I think the first couple of times I re-approached him, he barely even looked my way. But I remember that as he took another trip to his car and sat down, I knelt down, extended my hand and said, “Hi, I’m Lauren …are you willing to tell me what’s going on? We really want to help you. We have so much help available. Will you tell me what brings you here?”
Finally — after trying to find a balance between reaching out and stepping back (in order to set up an atmosphere of trust and safety should he respond) — he finally replied back and began to share their story.
Almost immediately as he began, his eyes filled with tears: “You can call me Junior.”
“Junior, it’s nice to meet you. What brings you all here today? What’s going on? How can we help you?”
“You know, I’m probably gunna hate myself for this… We have two children. This one wasn’t planned. We have a lifestyle that doesn’t allow for more than two children.”
I remember being stunned that he was so honest with me.
I had dealt before with those who chose abortion because it was just one baby too many from their perspective: “We have four, but can’t handle five.” Much of the time, that reply is wrapped around a big financial crisis — still a bad reason, of course, to take the life of a child, but better understood to be an act of desperation.
But in this case, here was this man, very honestly telling me that they valued a more comfortable lifestyle than this third child given to them. Literally, from the context of the conversation, I understood his choice to mean that this child was being traded for the extra car, the bigger house or the bigger bank account. (Sad when you consider that my husband is the third child in his family!)
He continued as the tears flowed freely, “I’m probably going to wake up tomorrow morning, look at myself in the mirror and hate myself for this.”
I remember marveling at the fact that even though abortion was said to be this empowering decision, he instinctively knew this was incredibly wrong — and painful.
In that moment, I remember gathering myself and asking him, “What is this worth? I want you to know that you don’t have to do this today. I want you to be able to wake up in the morning, look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of the choices you’ve made.”
He seemed to agree with what I was saying. I remember adding, “You need to go back in there, put your arm around your wife and tell her, ‘We make beautiful children. We can do this.'”
However, I remember marveling again at how difficult it was for this man to let go of the luxuries of his life to accept the gift of this child — a child who was being seen as nothing more than an inconvenience. It was, literally, like cement was on his feet.
Even so, I kept reiterating that this that this child was an immense gift — that, sometimes, the best things in life are those that are unplanned — and that abortion was a choice that was just going to bring them a lifetime of regret. But I couldn’t get him to budge.
And yet, he was crying about it. It was amazing to me that here was a man who was sobbing at the abortion center, almost admitting that yes, they were doing away with their third child to get the life they wanted …and he was likely still going to go through with it! I couldn’t believe how powerful “things” could be over our lives.
At that point, I switched gears (of course, still making it clear that I wanted him to go back inside and rescue his wife and child) — because I was afraid I would never get to say this to him — and added: “No matter what happens, I want you to know that you have a God who loves you, wants a relationship with you and wants to save you from all this.” In short, I basically shared the Gospel with him.
I can tell you that I’m not sure what choice they ultimately made that day. We had been out there for 6 hours, and we had to finally leave and let go, placing them in God’s hands (and we knew that they had life-saving literature, a referral to the local pregnancy center, our prayers and our words).
Whatever decision they made, I do know that Junior knows that a Christian was out there for him that day — very honestly sharing the truth with him, willing to love him into a different place, and offering the life-saving love of Jesus Christ. And I pray that moved or will move him towards a true conversion of heart.
I still pray for him. And I ask you to do so, as well.
Let us continue to pray for all those who are on the fence regarding abortion — especially, the 105 hopefuls that have received referrals through this ministry, that they will indeed choose life for themselves and their precious children!
Friends, thank you for supporting us in this work to save lives, transform hearts and end abortion through the grace of God!
Don’t forget! Applications to bring Sidewalk Advocacy through Sidewalk Advocates for Life to your local community are now open through November 30!
If your town or city would be blessed by Sidewalk Advocacy training, tools and support, we would LOVE to be a blessing to you and help you transform as many hearts and save as many lives as possible through God’s grace!
We provide…
- a small program manual that tells you how to set up and run SAFL in your town/city
- a comprehensive, professional 4-hour training DVD with training workbooks
- tools such as flyer templates, bulletin announcements, literature options, pro-bono legal services (through 3 pro-life legal organizations) …and more!
- full-time staff support
- a place on the Locations tab of our website, so people can find you
- a program that has a national reputation for being peaceful, prayerful & law-abiding
We know you’re busy, so we make it easy for you!
APPLY HERE: www.sidewalkadvocates.org/
Questions about the program? Feel free to email us at info@sidewalkadvocates.org!
WEEKLY DEVOTIONAL (NOVEMBER 16-22, 2014): “GRACE TO SEE”
by Lauren Muzyka, Executive Director, Sidewalk Advocates for Life
Verse(s): “Jesus asked him, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ He replied, ‘Lord, please let me see.’ Jesus told him, ‘Have sight; your faith has saved you.'” — Luke 18:40-42
Reflection: Biblical scholars recognize that this passage regarding the blind man reaching out to Jesus is not just about the desire for physical site, but the ability to see spiritually. It was also necessary that the blind man present his request to the Lord.
Sometimes, in pro-life work, we get so wrapped up in our work and message that we forget to humble ourselves and make time to ask the Lord for the ability to truly see — through eyes of faith and right discernment — if we are still on track…Lord, am I loving to the best of my ability? Is my message still YOUR message? Are my motives for doing what I’m doing pure? Have I been humble in receiving criticism or ideas from others? Do you want me to do anything differently?
In other words, have I asked the Lord to help me see where I need to humble myself, improve and be a more faithful servant in this work — which is, ultimately, His work? If so, do I have the right disposition in that I’m willing to receive whatever he wants to share with me so much so that I’m willing to be corrected?
Faith Challenge: Let us — in some quiet time with the Lord this week — go before Him and examine ourselves, our motives and our tactics. Ask yourself: am I just as open to the difficult reply as I am the positive one?
Let us pray that everyone will know we belong to Him by our love — and the willingness to love His ways above any of our own (cf. — John 13:35).